Saturday, November 24, 2012

Black Friday

Look at the Black Friday deal I got—a shiny new liver! It was worth getting up at 4 AM. I got the last one. Apparently, everyone needed shiny new livers to replace the ones that they destroyed the day before.
I can’t wait to see what deals show up on Cyber Monday. Perhaps I will find a good deal on a pancreas. 

Saturday, November 17, 2012

The Hepatitis Comics’ Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is a time to remember those things for which I am grateful. This week, the Hepatitis Comics honors this holiday with an obscure appreciation list.
  • I am thankful that hepatitis C prefers the liver, an organ that regenerates, rather than the heart, which doesn’t manufacture new cells. If it attacked the heart, I would have cardioitis C and that would mean the Hepatitis Comics would be the Cardioitis Comics, which has a ring to it, but is harder to say.
  • I am thankful that I can poke fun of my liver, hepatitis, and Thanksgiving, because if I had to be serious and respectful of those things, I would certainly die a long, pitiful death.
  • I am thankful that after 3 years of bile humor, no one has written to me and told me that I am not funny, which admittedly, sometimes I am not. Writing this blog has been therapeutic, even if not always funny.
  • I am thankful for the two or three of you out there who read this blog, or at least, I think read this blog. If you don’t read it, don’t tell me. I need to hold on to my delusions.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Six-Word Memoir

My favorite page in the AARP magazine (yes, sadly, I do read it), is titled, Six-Word Memoirs. It is a delightful column edited by Larry Smith. The concept is based on an event in which Ernest Hemingway was asked to tell a story in only six words. He wrote, "For sale: baby shoes, never worn."
So, I thought I'd have a go at it:
  • Hepatitis C stole my favorite liver
Does "C' count as a word?
Try your hand at it - it's fun. Send your memoirs and I'll publish them.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Vampires with Hepatitis C

Halloween has come and gone and with it, all the spooky vampire costumes. Speaking of vampires, did you know that those who engage in vampire play are at risk of spreading blood-borne diseases? This includes hepatitis C, HIV, and hepatitis B. Sex with blood adds a completely new dimension of risk. B & D, S & M, and sex with chain saws are risky behaviors if one of the players has a blood-borne virus or bacteria. So, if you are thinking of introducing activities in your sex play that involve blood, go to a joke shop and buy fake blood—it is much safer.