Saturday, April 30, 2011

Funny But Not Liverish

The True Doctor Stories series is providing quite a few laughs for my liver:
 A man comes into the ER and yells, “My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs, and I was in the wrong one. ~ Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX

Friday, April 22, 2011

The Liver Bunny

I am rewriting Easter traditions to be politically and hepatically correct for those living with liver disease. No more marshmallow peeps or colored eggs. The Liver Bunny brings liver–shaped  jelly beans and antioxidant-rich dark chocolate. Inside of those plastic colored eggs are jokes and gift certificates to your favorite spa. This may sound ridiculous, but so does a rabbit that leaves eggs on Easter morning.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Funnier than Fiction

This is another from the True Doctor Stories series:
I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, "Cover your right eye with your hand." He read the 20/20 line perfectly. Now your left." Again, a flawless read. Now both," I requested. There was silence. He couldn't even read the large E on the top line. I turned and discovered that he had done exactly what I had asked; he was standing there with both his eyes covered. I was laughing too hard to finish the exam. ~ Dr. Matthew Theodropolous, Worcester, MA

Friday, April 8, 2011

April is National Donate Life Month

Organ donation is serious business. The only thing that I can think of that is even remotely funny about organ donation is the Internet stories about people being drugged who have their body parts ransacked. They wake up in a bathtub filled with ice; a note tells them that they should call 911 because their kidneys or part of their liver has been removed.  I can’t imagine anyone who was diabolic enough to steal someone’s organ bothering with the ice.